How To Spot Fake News

Did you know that the news is infallible? Not only is the news infallible, but so are the people who create it. They do it for free! It's a free gift from the Lord above, as they are ordained by him for their time allotted to distribute nothing but the truth. Even if they were to accept payment, they would do so blindly, with no regard to whom was giving it to them. They would accept it graciously, as a gift, and they would never dream of being partial.

     It is our duty as citizens to trust our news providers, as they spend all of their time trying to figure out how to make our lives better. They are strong enough to stand up to powerful people who don't have anyone but their own best interest in mind.

     You can rest assured that good always wins, therefore, the message you are hearing the most often is probably true, no matter how too good to be true or fishy or outlandish it may seem. If anything goes against the common narrative, it is obviously false. Don't trust disention or antinomianism of any kind. There is no need to argue, for if you trust in truth the vehicle of its service, you will never fail! History is a futile enterprise, and so is philosophy and science. Also, one must finally defeat the enemy within and, at all costs, suppress the urge to deviate from the slogans provided by the ministry of truth, for only by them will everyone remain on the one, true, only, final and singular path.

     Let the voice of the first and loudest you hear be your guide!